Okay, I knew it had be too good to be true. I just don't get it. Why do guys feel they need to impress me with money and pretending to be who they're not. I just don't get it. I'm an honest and up front type of person. I don't have any money either, it's cool....I'm happy. Money comes and Money goes....mostly goes....But since I started this newly found single life, I keep running across these candidates for Prozac poster children. What the hell? The latest one, he went the way of fabricating a much brighter life only to have me discover he was full of shit! My mistake. I take people at their word. Sorry it's old school I know but damn, am I that gullible? Lie after lie, and I believe most of it was made up on the spot. I actually believed his shit! I'm not perfect, I don't' expect anyone else to be. People when you're life is nothing but drama, figure out why you are causing your drama, YOU ARE THE CAUSE OF YOUR OWN DRAMA. Don't put it on someone else to solve your drama. That's not fair. And if you're sick, get help, seek help....don't live in denial. Common'...it's in your face how can you pretend it's not there? It's blatantly obvious, why deny it? I'm tired. I don't need teenage drama and flat out denial. I'm too old for this crap. It's not working! You're not fooling anyone. Put it away Suzi.I'm sad about this last one. He was very sweet to me. I had an early sign. I knew we had no chemistry after when we went to the coast and there was no TV at the B&B! OH my GAWD the horror! (I can seriously live without tv. DSL hookup? Kill me first before dial up!) But he couldn't. I really liked this one. I knew this trip would be the tell all be all relationship breaker. Yep, I was right, we couldn't hold a conversation to save our lives. We were doomed. Cuz ya know, when the sex is gone, all you got left is conversation. And really I just like to be held. Then after that purely obvious flaw in this match, the lies started to fly.
I was dumbfounded at first....going "what the hell????" I laid back and watched. See how far he'd take it. He took it way far. So far out there that I no longer believe anything that comes out of his mouth. We're talking pathological liar here. Or in desperate need of some psyche drugs. Something, cuz that boy just ain't right. Definitely not a life partner. By any means.
Then the annoying habits started to come into play. 15 phone calls to my cell and home phone in just under 2 hours. Leaving a message every time. Saying stuff like "I'm going to bed" in a panic stricken voice, 6 times in a row....! Or the beat puppy dog voice when I don't pick up my cell phone after the 6th call in 10 minutes. Maybe it's me. I don't have the urge to call my significant other multiple times a day to listen to them breathe in the phone. Let me just give you an example of the kind of drama I've been putting up with for the last 6 months....
It started out....Hey baby what do you REALLY want for Christmas? A Nikkon D80 camera. But it's too expensive to ask for, but I'm buying it in Feb. It's too much for someone to spend on me.
For weeks after that, he kept saying, "you're gonna love your present". "it's your dream camera"...."I paid for all of it at the camera store in town". "you can pick it up in a week, they were out of them".
One week later: "oh, there's something wrong with the lens, has to be sent back, another week".
One week later on that Friday: "my credit card didn't go through". "I'll have my boss send a check to the camera store via Fed Ex".
That Saturday: "Fed Ex picked up the check, but nobody knows where it went after that". (I had a photo gig to do that night, I was sweatin it big time.) "We're sending a courier out to pick up another check and deliver it to the camera store by 4 o'clock today".
4 O'clock: Camera store owner calls me and says, "We have to wait for the check to clear, you can come pick it up in 5 working days". (Luckily, I'm a resourceful girl and pulled off that gig without a hitch.)
That following Friday": "Do me a big favor, go pick up your camera". Not 15 minutes went by and the owner called me up and said they had a letter from the bank saying they cancelled the check. Must be a mistake, right? I found out later that this check from his boss was cancelled on purpose because they were bankrupt and had no money to cover it. Interesting.
Then for a few days I heard nothing of the camera. Until we were on a little trip he insisted on taking to the coast. "oh your birthday/Christmas present is under the back seat of my truck."
We get down to the bay area and he disappears for a few hours. I found out later that he had gone to another camera shop and bought it Christmas eve. He hands the bag to my mom and asks her to wrap it. Then he insists on making me open it in front of my whole family who was attending the traditional dinner. We always open our gifts from immediate family after the cousins and aunts all leave. Cuz we don't wanna make people feel left out or bad....cuz it's just a frenzy. Anyway, he makes me open it in front of everyone, and as I pull out the box, there is stunned silence. It's a camera alright, a camera that was not what I wanted and it had no lenses. I couldn't even use it. I went over to him and kissed his cheek and told him thank you while my family looked on in disbelief. They all knew what it was supposed to be, including me, cuz he couldn't keep his mouth shut and he's quite the bragger. Then later he tells me that I can take it back and get the one I 
want because they didn't have any more D80s in stock. He said he paid for all the lenses and a kit, I just have to return it up where I live later on. Okay, I can do that.
Where's the receipt? "oh, I left it in my friend's truck. He's gonna send it up to you Fex Ex." By this time we had gone home, 3 hours north of where he bought it.
I won't even get into the drama that ensued during that few days. He ended up being driven by this friend back down south, the friend brought the receipt up with him when he picked him up. When I got the receipt, I noticed it's much lower then the price of the camera I wanted. ( I had been pricing these for a year, I knew how much it was.) Like 2/3 less. "just have the sales guy pull up the receipt number and it will show all the stuff I bought at the other store."
So the following Saturday I take an hour long car ride down to return the camera and do like he said to do. I walked out of that store not even being able to return it cuz the check hadn't gone through yet!
At that point, I was done. I packed up all that was givin to me and sent it back down to him. I told him to keep his money, I was getting the damn thing in Feb anyway. "Just get your money back".
I then broke up with him. It wasn't just because of the camera drama, there was much much more in between that I just can't bore you with. Including, but not limited to several blows to the head, two trips to the ER and many panic attacks. Blood where it shouldn't be and then hidden in plain sight. Kids not spoken of and an army career that never existed. Not to mention the white elephant of a house and a Harley that he pretended didn't exist and thus abandoned. I'd had it. The denial was too large for me to tackle. Bold faced, flat out lies. I was done. I was so overwhelmed with his problems that mine ceased to exist. Though tiny in comparison, let me tell ya, they had all been pushed aside to deal with his. I woke up and decided that was enough. 
But the camera just won't go away. Today I received, via Fed Ex, a package from him. It is a Nikkon Cool Pix digital camera and Epson printer. Very nice indeed, but still not a Nikkon D80. I'll keep it because he went through all this drama, self inflicted drama, to buy me a camera. I'll always think of him when I use it. I did really like him. He just blew it by pretending to be something he wasn't. And there is so much more, so much more I could say, but I cared for the guy and I'm not going to air all of his flaws on the web.
It just wasn't meant to be. SaLaVie.
J. Grace
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